Home

Well,here I am home by myself once more. I did talk to my hubby and he will be coming home Mon nite as they are almost finished silaging but he also has a Board meeting and a funeral to work on Tues. That will be the beginning of our Fall routine I think. In a week or two he will be gone again to do harvest but for now, it will be routine (whatever that is)!

Our 'kids' left on Friday morning and I left right after them to drive to Calgary. It was a clear sunny day so all went well. A bit of construction but no holdups. Had a great visit with my brother & wife and even watched a few movies inbetween our conversations. It was such a nice day and the place they are housesitting at was beautiful too. It was very relaxing and the drive to and from was too.

All that time in the car does help you to think about a few things. My mind was 'all over the place' though and didn't really 'think through' a lot of stuff but it does get a person to thinking about all the things they do in a short period of time. I guess it is whatever you think is 'priority' and you go from there. I usually go by whatever needs to be done first and what is most important sometimes gets left to the last but even so, we can do a lot when we have to get something done. It was a 'light bulb moment' for me as I had been thinking I was beginning to slip a bit and was not being too productive. I guess I place value on 'productivity' rather than quality. I need to reasses that!

Anyway, I am just thinking I need to actually spend some time reviewing what the priorities are in my life now and maybe even 'try' to do a plan for myself - at least an overview - of what's important and what I should attempt to get done. Of course, this is not the first time I have said this so I won't be too surprised if I just continue to 'react' to life. However, I am stating in black and white this time that I would like to try.

Pretty Quiet

So, I have been on my own for two plus days now as the grandkids went to the farm and so did my daughter and husband. I had to work. In some ways I am thankful for that as I was able to relax a bit and even got some sleep. Although I always tend to stay up late when I don't have someone waiting for me to come to bed (or subconsciously making me accountable for my health) I actually made it to bed at the same time and one night even earlier than usual. That just proves to me that I was tired. Don't get me wrong, I love my family visiting. It's just tiring when you are not used to lots of people around. Cooking for a larger group is always a challenge as well.

As a once singe-parent with one child, and then married with still only one child, cooking for three was my norm. It was never my favourite thing to do so I guess I have never progressed (in my mind anyway). My husband tells me I can do it and could do more if I wanted to but I guess that is the problem...I don't want to!! I loved my mom's cooking and she could cook for one or 10+ and it didn't seem to matter to her. But it does to me!

Ok, I don't want to go down this trail of why I do or don't like cooking so I will just say it has been relaxing only having to worry about myself for supper! As an aside though, I realize that I have not been eating as healthy (meaning the four food groups) as I would had there been if there were two of us here!

It's interesting how can there can be two virtual realities. The one that has my family here visiting with me and the one that has them living in B.C. It is strange how I can totally get lost in any crossover. My mind is totally occupied with them when they are here. You would think that I did not have another life - it certainly feels like it! I don't think or read or do anything related to my 'real life' reality when my 'out of province' reality is with me. It is hard to bring both of them together. It's like being cross-eyed. You may not understand it. I find it hard to understand. Maybe as you get older, you actually can only do one thing at a time. Multi-tasking becomes more difficult. My daughter actually told me a few days ago that it appeared to her that I was having difficulty doing more than one thing at a time! Thanks. It may have been the time she was telling me something while I was busy trying to organize dinner for seven of us and watching our 5 year old (out of the corner of my eye) picking up his 6 month old sister who was resisting his attempts making him even more determined to do it! I admit, I was distracted! She also has a very soft voice and tends to undulate when she speaks (my definition meaning she doesn't finish her sentences strong but fades away). I seem to have a hard time 'tuning in' to her voice frequency and I often miss what she says. I ask her to repeat which becomes annoying to her so I nod instead. I know that is not the answer but what can you can do?!! My husband said I often miss what he has said so perhaps I do have a hearing problem. I might have to check that out. On the other hand, I seem to pick up what people are saying when they are not talking directly to me.I wonder if that means anything about my personality?

Anyway, I had time to spend a few days in my own reality and tried to get a few things done but admittedly I was tired and relaxed more than did anything else. My 'other reality' comes back today so I need to gear up for it. I will make a quick check if I need to do anything in 'this world' so I don't forget it over the next few days, but otherwise, "I'm out of here". I'll call when I return!

Smoke in the trees

It looks like it might be a nice day today as the sun is shining - I think. There is so much smoke in the air that the colour of daylight and sunshine is a pinky opaque ...almost. It is really weird. Last night at the dinner theatre, you could smell smoke in the room. Like something was burning in the kitchen! The river valley was filled with it - the open fields and treed areas appear like early morning fog. It's definitely not normal. They say it is from the forest fires in BC. Wow, I wonder what it is like right at the fire. I miss my blue sky - it is now kind of grey/blue.

We had intended to go to Bonnyville for the horse trail ride but weather there is raining and muddy. Again, weird for this time of the year. This whole month has been on the (can I say it again?) weird side!

The grandkids are over at their cousins for a sleepover again so it is quiet this morning. Nice...but I miss them. They are going to go to the farm on Sunday to just visit but since I work Mon I won't go with them. Alone again.

As I write this I can smell smoke. Didn't I just say that it is really smokey here? Well, it continues to be so. I hope the wind changes direction soon.

Different Routine

The grandkids are here - but then again - they are not! Well, it feels like it in some ways as I had to work on Mon and Tues. During the day they were out and enjoying the waterslides and the amusement park at WEM both days. Last nite they had a sleepover with cousins so I didn't get to see too much of them. The night before, they were late in coming home but I did have a chance to go for a quick walk and watched Peter Pan on DVD with them. They needed to get to bed as they were tired (but not according to them)!

They are definitely in the 'entertain me' mode as they don't want to just sit around - they're on holidays! However, that is not the real world right? Since they were at their cousins overnite, we got to sleep in a bit more this morning. Not that 7:15 is late but I didn't have to rush is more like it. I had my coffee, enjoyed it outdoors and had my oatmeal about 8:30 when Brandy got up to have some as well. We took off by 10 am to find a fall coat for her birthday. Yes, we were successful! She is now over at the cousins picking up the kids to be home for supper. After playing with 5 other kids it will be 'quiet' for them here but c'est la vie!

John-boy will be home about 6:30 from the farm so he will get a chance to visit (and hopefully he will be here in time to bbq)! We're having hamburgers!

Anyway, it is nice to have family here - it is a different routine - but they say a change is as good as a rest - something I will be looking forward to I am sure in another week!

Who would have thought?

It is day 5 of being on my own since John went to the farm. Although day one I had to work, the rest of the days have been spent 'cleaning out the spare room' as well as a lot of other surrounding cleanup which results from it.

The other day I wrote about the funny story of the lady who never got anything accomplished because she kept being distracted by something else? Well, that funny lady is definitely ME!! I must say that I do have the room in much better shape than it was. I have literally tossed two whole garbage bags full, plus one plastic recycle bag full. Two of them are going to Sally Ann's and one is for the garbage. Now, having said that...there were a hundred smaller jobs that resulted out of this.

One of the dressers held a number of developed photos which had not found a home yet. As well, there were two small ' brag' photo albums which contained random photos over the past year. I had decided I was going to put this year's developed photos into an album so they could easily tell the story of 2010. Ha! Although many photos were in there, many more were not! So...I started a 'bunny trail' yesterday from the spare room to my dining room whereby I put all these photos into the album. To do that, I needed to first sort them out chronologically and then I got the bright idea to type up a description for them on Word and then print it off. It sounded good. It did work out. But...it takes time. Once printed off, I had to cut them into standard sized pieces to fit into the slot below the photo which is provided for in the album. Putting the picture into the slot is much easier than sliding a piece of paper into the designated slot which for some reason, tends to stick together almost tightly. However, I did not give up. I stayed with it and it is now completed! Yes!

Last night, I removed all the bedding and washed it and this morning put on clean bedding for all the duvets and fitted sheets on the bunk beds. Have you ever tried putting on sheets on the top level of a bunk?! Not only are my legs short, so are my arms!!! I ended up with two chairs stationed side by side as I walked on each of them as I stretched out the sheet on the top bunk. I then had to climb onto the top bunk to secure it around the back edges. Once you climb on the bunk, your weight tends to hold the sheet in place. This might be a good thing unless you want to stretch out the sheet to fit the corners! Yes, it was quite a spectacle and brought laughter erupting from my inners. Thankfully, I was alone.

The beds are now made and the dresser is empty so that the grandkids can put their clothes in there while they are here for a week. My clothes,which were in the dresser, are now packed away in a plastic container. Half of the clothes which were removed, did not fit, were very old, OR I just didn't like them anymore and finally tossed them! It was quite a parting for me and my clothes!

The next thing to be tackled was the desk with all my papers on it. I did find (under many books) a number of photos which I needed to add to this year's album (which as I said I had already completed). This meant I had to redo some pages and have yet to do the insert for them. I am hoping to do that after lunch.

As I removed some of the papers to the garbage, I took a bathroom break. It was here that I noticed that my white shower curtain was not really white anymore. So...I tackled the obvious. I am sure this is done all the time (maybe not in my house though) but I thought it would take 'no time at all'. Ha! Have you ever tried to remove a shower curtain with your hands over your head for any length of time? Those little suckers do not want to first...come undone...and second...come off the holder. Each one was a challenge. The blood to my head was being forced up to my finger tips which is 26 inches from my shoulder to the longest finger (I just measured it)!! My head was getting light or better yet, lightheaded! Thankfully, I did not fall OFF the little 12 inch stool which was helping me at least reach the top of the shower curtain. With that finally completed, I threw it in the washer (literally, threw it)!

An hour or so later, I am doing the same thing but in reverse! My shoulder and neck are stiff and tight. But, the curtain looks great! However, no one will really notice how white and bright it is except me!

Ok, back to work. Just one more desk and I am finished. I think. I will need to dust and vacuum but basically the big stuff is done (for this year). If anyone, and I mean anyone, suggests that I need to throw out, or clean up or move around, anything in that room, well....the wrath of Khan will come upon them.

Have a great day! I wish you well in your cleaning endeavors!

I cannot believe that I went to the trouble of watering all my outdoor plants and now I sit here listening to the pouring rain. It was in a matter of less than an hour and it is raining heavily outside. At least my plants will not be thirsty - however - they may drown now! The sun was shining and it was beautiful an hour ago. I did my watering, drank my coffee and headed downstairs to the other computer to do some work. Downstairs, in the darkness of the basement, who knows what is going on outside!

Anyway, I get this telephone call from someone who immediately blurts out 'Where are you?' In response, I say "Who is this?" to which she replies "Laura." You don't know this but Laura is my hairdresser. In an instant, my mind goes over the last few weeks whereby she called me at work to tell me that she had to reschedule my appt for a cut and color as she was taking vacation a week early. This meant that I too had to have my hair done a week earlier. On my mental calendar, it reads c/c for next Thur morning. This morning, I have been busy doing a lot of nothing. I did NOT check my actual calendar.

So, what is the answer? She tells me she can do ONE or the OTHER. Cut or colour (if I can race over there right now). Otherwise, she is gone for two weeks and the first week back is booked. That means three weeks for me to wait and it has already been four weeks since I was in to see her. That would be a total of seven weeks before I got my hair cut and coloured. It may not seem like a big deal to you - but to me - my heart was pounding. My mind was racing as to how I could make the quick trip all the way to the northside in time to only get one or the other done by her. The alternative was to go to her cousin which is still on the northside and who has cut my hair before (but not like Laura). She tells me also while I am 'thinking' that it is pouring rain right now. 'Really?' I say, thinking how I had just come in from the sunny weather and watering my plants.

Oh boy, how things can change in a matter of minutes, or moments, or half-hours!! So, I get the phone # for her cousin, my hair colour formula and then tell her not to worry, I will look after things myself and get back to her in six weeks for my cut and colour again. I am NOT driving the Yellowhead in pouring rain - especially when I am running late and likely will be speeding! "Have a great holiday" I say, and tell her not to worry about it. After all, it was my mistake!

I go upstairs and check my calendar to find that I DID write it down and I can see that it is this morning at 10 am and I am obviously late! Also, it is pouring rain here as well. As I said, what a difference an hour makes!

Could this be me?

I went to a birthday party the other day for a friend who was turning 60. We started talking about our aches and pains and peculiarites that we are developing. One lady read a funny story about a woman who started to do one thing and through the course of events in a normal day, never did get one thing completed, but kept changing directions and starting new tasks. At the end of the day, she was tired but couldn't see that she accomplished a thing! We all had laughed!

You may have read that joke or may even be living it, like I have been lately! Like many of you, I have a room in the house which needs to be cleaned. Not just vaccuumed or dusted but literally ... pulled apart, things thrown out and basically gutted! Yes, this is my spare bedroom. This is where everything gets moved to from the kitchen table, counters or wherever a clean spot is needed. This is where games, cards, old papers, books, letters, recently purchased gifts, wrapping paper, binders, old files, soon-to-be returned items, outgrown clothes, 'maybe I will wear again one day' clothes, new clothes unwrapped, grandkid's toys, old letters, loose old pictures, old photo albums, new kids games, pencils, pens, coloured paper, keepsakes from the grandkids, old obituaries stacked neatly in chronological order, jewellery, braclets, earrings, clocks, etc etc etc You get my meaning?

Last night I started into the act of cleaning. I had decided I would empty the 5 drawers and see what did not fit, throw out old clothes, sort through what needed to be given away and what, if anything, could be salvaged. I was amazed at what I had 'stuffed' into those drawers. The floor was full. Now...I started sifting through it all. However, I made the mistake of opening a drawer in a different desk to find a pen to make a list. Thereby, finding some papers that had been misfiled or misplaced. I had been looking for them. I thought I had better put them some place I can find them for next time and promptly left the room. My favourite show was on tv so I sat down for 'just a moment' to watch this episode which was one I had not seen. An hour went by. Back to the bedroom I went. Now I was faced with the clothes on the floor. I headed to the kitchen for a black garbage bag.

Once there I noticed the new vinyl tablecloth that I had purchased a week earlier sitting on the dining room table. I thought I should actually do something with it before another week went by. I quickly opened the package and was going to try it for size on the table. First I needed to clean off the table once again. The portable fan was set on the floor, the Rummy-O game was moved to the kitchen Island along with today's mail. Placing the new tablecloth over the old (just to check sizing) Standing back to check the look of it all, I glanced at my laptop which was left open and running from earlier this morning. I also noticed I had not finished my email that I was working on. I thought I had better 'send' that note before it was no longer applicable and sat down to finalize the message. As I pushed the 'send' button, I checked the time and realized I needed to have my oatmeal as I wanted to be dressed and out of here so I could get to the bank by 10 am to pay my visa bill. As the water boiled for my oatmeal, I quickly went to get the oatmeal out of the jar when I realized it was empty (as of yesterday) so went to the cupboard to get the big bag to refill it. As I was removing it, I noticed once again the box of Robin Hood Flaky Piecrust which has been there for a very long time. I thought I had 2 minutes left before the water boiled so I would quickly remove that box and throw out the contents and move on. Yes, good intentions. I ended up removing it as well as a number of other items which had long overstayed their expiration date and decided I was doing 'a good thing' by finally cleaning out this cabinet. The water boiled longer than the required time but I was able to at least refill the counter oatmeal container from the big Costco oatmeal box. Now to finally eating the breakfast. It is 10:12 a.m. and the dish is empty but I am still sitting at the kitchen counter, now doing my blog. It seemed like such a good idea at the time!

My second cup of coffee is half done and cold now as I realize I need to remove the old tablecloth which still sits under the new vinyl one I had put on a short while ago before being distracted. After finally throwing away the plastic wrap and removing the old and replacing with the new, I threw the old one in the wash so I think I have finally completed ONE task this morning.

The bedroom still sits in disaray but my dining room looks ok (which it did before) but now it looks even better! Guess I should try getting ready now to go to the bank. I wonder if I can make it to the washroom to put on my makeup before being diverted again. Lucky the visa is not due for another few days!!!

My thought for the day calendar reads:
"Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and discover they were the big things." author unknown.

Alone Again

Well, it's that time of the year again - silage. My husband has taken off to the farm and has 'fallen back in time' to the 'good ol' days' (as I like to refer to them)and sitting on a tractor or hay machine or whatever they are called. You would think I would remember the name of the machine afer all this time.

Each year he heads back to 'his roots' and helps out where he can on the farm. He loves being part of the farming routine again. I think he is very fortunate to be able to return to the place of his youth and to find it pretty much the same routine except for the update of the machinery and technology. Even though it gives him something new to learn it is basically the same process. He can just relax and be (if that makes any sense)? When he was working in an office all day, I used to understand it better. Although I understand him wanting to be outside more, I am still a little 'off' as to why he wants to work all day in the sun and ride on a tractor for 12 hrs in the heat and dirt. Must be a farm thing. I am happy for him that it makes him happy. Guess I will just leave it there, eh?

Meanwhile, my first night is a mixture of what can I do with myself and my time? I usually end up just watching whatever tv show I want. It usually is the night that nothing is on tv! I always end up staying up late which is never good when I have to work the next day. But a day or two into this routine and I do just that ... find routine. The whole 'routine' changes when he comes home again! I am happy to say that I still look forward to that day!

And we laughed

And we laughed and laughed and laughed. Over nothing in particular but everything seemed funny. That was the way of my visit with my friend Isla yesterday. She was having a particularly good day (in my estimate). I had picked her up to go for an 'outing' (as I refer to them) and she was excited to go. I do not think she recognized me (you can tell it from her eyes) but again...she seemed to sense we had connection ... somehow. Of course that is all my reasoning. She was likely just happy to 'go outside'.

We first went for a short drive as I wanted to go visit a friend's yard sale. We parked in the front and made our way to the back of their property, through a side gate with an unfinished side yard of weeds and dug up ground. I thought she was right behind me as I yelled over my shoulder to 'walk next to the fence' as it was more level. By the time I got to the back alley and had finished saying hello to my friend etc. I looked back to see her still at the front gate trying to close it. It was the kind that you flip up the metal handle and close the gate and flip it down again to secure it. She did not understand the concept. She just kept playing with it. When I realized she was still far behind me I called out to her to 'just leave it' and she stared blankly at me but followed the instruction. Then she proceeded to walk beside the house (the bumpy/dug up side) and thankfully made it to the backyard without incident!!! She was quite friendly to my friends and was actually smiling as one of the girls had a 6 month old baby in her arms. She seemed very taken with him. After deciding there was nothing there to buy we left and went for a Tim's Iced Cappuccino and then home to my place.

I brought out my board game 'Rummy-O' and proceeded to explain it. Well...she did require me to explain the same thing a number of times but I remember the same happening with me when I first learned it! Anyway, we had some good laugh. As fortune would have it, there were no blue #6 tile on the board and that was what I needed. I kept saying 'if I had a six' which she kept interpreting as 'sex' and would roll in laughter with eyes filling with water. She had a few responses to it each time and I admit I laughed till I was crying my own self!! It set her off the same way every time. She never seemed to grow tired of it. The same amount of laughter and response came from each time I looked for my missing 6!! They do say laughter is the best medicine though.

She stopped me in the middle of the game to say 'thank you' (which really surprised me). I asked 'why" and she replied "at the lodge I never really talk to anyone as they just seem to sit and stare at me. I never use my mind or have to think and this is making me do that!" We had a few comments and laughs over some gutteral noises she made about responses from the residents and proceeded once more to the game (with more explanations of the same thing). I have to admit though, I was having fun myself!

I took her home 5 minutes late for her dinner and she surprised me once again as I was signing her in. She gave me a hug and said 'guess this is what friends are for'. Admidst the confusion in her mind, she still recognized the 'friendship' part of our relationship. I told her I would definitely be back and she said "I'd like that".

Humbling? you bet. Take a look around you...there is always someone who is hurting and could use a friend. Friendship...I guess you CAN take it for granted...but then you can still polish it again like new.

Camped Out - literally!

We made it home safe and sound from our two week vacation. Had a great time with the kids and even got a chance to meet up with one of my brother's and his family. Relax, relax, relax was the intent for this vacation!

It doesn't get too much better than Redstreak Campground in Kootenay Park. The weather was it's usual - hot - 34C or around there - for the first week and then it cooled off to about 22-24C for the second week. Although 34C is ok for the evening - sitting around in a tank and shorts till 10 pm - I much prefer the 24C and wearing capri's and a pullover for sitting around the campfire at 10 pm. But hey, no complaints from me either way. It was great!

We had our daughter and family show up on Thur nite and they left on Mon morning. The 3 kids stayed with us in our tent trailer, Josh 9, Alicia 7 and Ethan 5. I think they enjoyed themselves. We sure did. It was quite different than just the two of us. They took the baby, 6 months old Grace, with them to the motel while we 'camped out' with the grandkids. We were up at 7 am and having hot chocolate for the kids and coffee...lots of coffee ... for the grownups! My most common comment was 'not till Gramma has her coffee' and they seem to recognize that now and don't ask too many questions until 'after'. Worked fine!

Since we have been camping all of our married life, it was time to 'begin again' showing all the hikes, forest information, general 'trivia' that we have collected over the years. Or should I say, grampa has collected! He is a mountain of information. There were lots of 'why' or 'how' questions by the kids and John was in his glory (my viewpoint only).

I have not blogged for a number of weeks and here I am again wondering what is worthwhile to mention. I have not been able to figure out how to add my pictures since the last time. May have to forego that again. It was a bit of a 'cleansing' session being away as I did not have my laptop with me. It goes to show how much time I was spending on it though as I was having 'withdrawal' pains! I was always wondering what was going on in the 'real' world. Eventually though, I was able to just sit back and relax and enjoy doing 'nothing' for a change. Once the grandkids came though, it was a different story. I would not give that up for the world though. It is such an adventure with them. Everything is new so that makes it interesting for us 'all over again'.

It is back to work on Monday and back into routine. Maybe then I can be more creative once more. Where did the summer go anyway? Seems like we are half way through it. I must say though that I enjoy my backyard. We have had lots of rain and it is green and lush. I do need to find some time to paint the deck but hey, there's always tomorrow!!

I have been reading a very good book called "intimate conversations' by alicia britt chole. It is a devotional book. I love her writing style as it suits the way I think. Anyway, a bit of reflection from her as follows: "Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest." Mark 6:31 She was commenting on this verse and how she had first started a 'prayer retreat' time. That is a time away by herself to simply pray. Having a family can make it difficult but she and her husband decided it was an important thing to do so...it gets done. Solitude increased her awareness that she was never alone. She would read...listen...the God who is always near soothed her anxious heart with his Word.

Another great writer, Henri Nouwen suggests we dedicate one hour a day, one afternoon a week, one day a month, and one week a year to prayer retreats with Jesus. All walks begin with one step. She suggests we take a moment to see how we can carve out some time alone in our lives to be with God.

Like Alicia Chloe, I too have found it difficult to 'fit God into my schedule' so am trying the reverse. I am trying to fit my schedule around God. Takes a bit of work ... every day ... but I find somehow the day turns out a lot better. Maybe this would work for you too!